The Romance Novel Routine
I’m in advertising, and for about six months ago I’ve been intrigued with how men and women communicate. What happened is that a friend of mine in the publishing industry told me this fact that blew me away.
(pause. I know the interest level is REALLY high here, because I always have their undivided attention at this point . In fact, one girl shooshed one of her friends who tried to interrupt me at this point).
He told me that out of all of the books sold in the US, 49% of them dealt with every category except for one. For instance – religion, art, physics, the Bible … everything … except for one. The other 51% is this other category… do you know what it is? (I’ve heard three answers: #1 “Self-help” #2 “Sex” #3 “I don’t know” – can we refine this?)
Romance Novels.
(HB: “ahhhhh, yes!”).
Well, I’m the kind of guy who if you tell me something interesting like that, I think and think and think about it. You know? So I got to thinking … why is that? Well, I went to the local Borders and I found the romance section … this HUGE (hold hands out) section that I’ve never noticed before! These three women were there looking at books,
so I asked one of them to recommend one for me (HBs always get this astonished look on their face) and I buy it. I get about 5 pages into it, and I’m thinking “what the hell is this?”. I call my buddy, and he says “keep reading”. So I finish it.
Well, I grew up with 6 female cousins and 2 older sisters … no brothers … I thought I understood women … but that book blew me away. I was seeing this girl at the time and it was sort of dull… you know… Anyway, I was writing her an email and I got the idea that maybe I should rephrase things a little bit, you know, the way that a woman wants to hear. So I rewrote my email, saying the same exact thing that it said before, but worded differently. I spoke to HER… the next day, at 5:45am I got her reply … “I couldn’t sleep all night, I’ve been thinking about you constantly, I have never had anybody
understand me so well before, I am feeling so passionate right now.
Jinx Opener Wrong Number Routine